4 Weeks (November 10, 2010) - Second round of blood tests, get poked by another needle!
5 Weeks (November 16, 2010) - Go to the doctor (again) and finally see the little peanut in the first of many photo shoots. We also got to "see" the baby's heartbeat at this time. It was very exciting, emotional, and overwhelming. We seriously sat there like gawky kids staring at their Christmas presents; just reveling at our news and that this tiny little sac (see below) was in fact a BABY!
5 Weeks 2 days (November 18, 2010) - We meant to wait to tell all of our family until the following week at Thanksgiving. It was supposed to be a big dinner surprise that actually we couldn't wait any longer to keep secret.
5 Weeks 3 days (November 19, 2010) - The Morning Sickness begins. Or should I say ALL DAY Sickness in which this momma sadly ditched her former favorite activity of eating for ice cold water, vomiting, and the occasional cracker and Gatorade.
8 Weeks (December 1, 2010) - Finally get to hear the heartbeat of our little peanut for the first time! It was truly a miracle God shared with us. The baby's heartbeat was so fast, so strong, and so precious. This little noise will be forever be ingrained in both of our minds!
11 Weeks 6 Days (December 27, 2010) - We went to the genetics center for the usual testing. I felt so disconnected before this appointment because for awhile we hadn't seen the baby, still didn't know the gender, or had even heard the heartbeat again. We hadn't even seen the full baby except for 1 scan to show us his "home" (or to be medically correct - the sac) .But finally, we went for an ultrasound and the series of tests that are performed to thoroughly examine the baby's development, specifically checking for spina bifida and Downs syndrome. Obviously we had made many important decisions in our lives but when to start our family was to date the biggest. Deciding to date, get married, and buy our home really are easy in comparison to bringing a life in to this world. Truth be told I hadn't really thought much about the "gravity of the situation" before the genetics testing. Why? I was too busy feeling sorry for my nauseous self. But it really hit both of us before going to this testing because we realized not just that genetics testing is expensive when your PPO insurance doesn't cover it, but the responsibility and the multitude of decisions ahead of us.
13 weeks (January 3, 2011) - I woke up without nausea. Now I know it's not really a "milestone" but audience of 1-2 let me tell you this leaving my body made me finally celebrate being pregnant. I was feeling so rotten before that it just wore on me greatly physically and emotionally, and especially on my poor husband. But waking up this day really changed my perspective on the pregnancy. During the nasty phase I was convinced I had a disease not a baby. I felt so disconnected because for awhile we hadn't seen the baby, still didn't know the gender, or had even heard the heartbeat again. Not only was I getting frustrated, but I truly had a lot of fear. As I said before, I will always be honest as I rant here, but I did let fear and even anger grip me during the 6 weeks that I was not feeling well. Sometimes it was the intensity of nausea or sometimes the height of my emotions, other times the fears of miscarriage or failure were there. But a good friend finally told me that it was ok to pray for myself. Huh? Well yes I knew that. But it was just that someone finally reminded me that it's ok to be upset, tired, and frustrated. But more importantly, Yes, it was ok to pray to God to take over the nausea and bring forward a healthy, happy pregnancy. I truly thought well, if I pray will He take it away? I don't want to miscarry it's just that I selfishly couldn't stand being nauseous anymore! Irrational as it sounds, these are the crazy thoughts of a pregnant woman. So every night I closed my eyes and just prayed. Prayed for myself, my husband, my family, and even my friends who were all dealing with me. I prayed for more patience within me, patience toward me, and for the precious life growing in me. And guess what? Upon my realization and prayers (and yes, the wonderful second trimester) it just went away.
So.... since these milestones and uber-exciting appointments (yes there is a twinge of sarcasm there) we have progressed through this pregnancy.... of course more to come because we're furhter than just those 13 weeks. Thanks for bearing with me through this long post and for the written therapy I'm allowed here!
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